Screwed

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It was a long and busy day today, filled with almost 2 hours of parent-teacher conferences plus work type stuff. When I got home, I slogged my way through feeding the fam, and was looking forward to getting my home decorating on with some new photo frames I bought at Target.

Dinner was done. I sent the kiddies to bed. I grabbed the frames, edited and printed the photos I wanted to use, and unwrapped the packaging from the frames.

Wait. What are these screws doing at the top of the package? Do you see those? They serve no purpose except to hold the packaging on *tighter* and to require me to locate and use a screwdriver to put a stinking photo in a frame. What the heck, Target? Are you going to make me get out a chainsaw to open the toilet paper, too?

I was vexed by the frames, so I decided to head to bed with my phone and try out the WordPress app to write my complainey post. I’ve never posted to my blog from my phone before. It’s making me a little paranoid.

What if I accidentally upload my whole contacts list to the internet and then everyone hates me because creepy weirdos (not you, obviously) start calling them?

What if I accidentally post a picture of my boobs? That would be extra odd since I don’t have any of that sort of photo on *this* phone. That would mean that my phone was actively trying to send out boob pictures.

I should probably stop now, because some of my kids’ classmates’ parents occasionally read my blog. Next time I go to the school they’ll all hustle their kids away from me and whisper, “don’t talk to her, sweetie. She’s the one who thinks her phone is secretly taking pictures of her boobs.”

I blame Target.

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